Hey Torture Supporters

I like to portray myself as a genial fellow in my literary pup tent here, because I am, in fact, genial most of the time. But not when I hear these two words in this order: "torture debate." There is no debate among anyone who knows a damn thing about interrogation. So when I am forced to acknowledge that some people—well, humanoids, at any rate—think the United States ought to be in the torture business, I seethe with contempt. I won't try to argue with you; if you think the United States should torture people, you're ipso facto a doctrinaire ignoramus who's immune to rational argument. So I'll just ask you one question:

Have you ever been accused of something that you didn't do?

Well?

Ahhh—hear that? The sound of chirping crickets. How very pleasant.